17 December 2017

Forgiving the Offended

Did I offend some of you with my last post? Are you perhaps feeling offended on behalf of someone else like a good social justice warrior? Can I offer you some forgiveness?

Not understanding, I made a couple of turns in my life and made some choices. I was a very lucky person - I chose to follow some unspoken advice at very pivotal moments in my life and I stumbled, somewhat accidentally, upon a wonderful road and a miraculous journey that has brought me indescribable joy.  I was timid and shy and didn't have lots of friends as a young man and I can only say that, in a strange way, these things saved me from the confusion and heartache that floods over our times. So many people are searching for real happiness and true meaning - I practically tripped over it years ago and I stuck with it without really knowing what I had found. I look back on my marriage and my family and I was just doing what my parents had done and their parents and their parents before that. None of them were perfect by any stretch of the imagination but they shared with me a marvelous gift and they probably didn't even comprehend its value fully. Can you guess what the gift was?

They gave me life. They gave me plenty of other things as well, but let's focus on the essential thing.

In generations past, men and women married, had children, and raised families who went on to surround them with more marriages, new children and families, until there were dozens, even hundreds, of other men and women who can all be traced back to one couple who came together perhaps because they were following a tradition. Lately, old traditions like natural marriage and family life have been cast aside in favor of far lesser things, such as gay marriage or a purposefully childless lifestyle.  New ideas and forms that don't bring new children into the world and don't perpetuate families and the generations going forward are put about as "just as good" as the age-old tradition of natural families. I am happy to offend everyone in saying that the "new" ways (just old perversions made permissive) do not lead to the indescribable joy that I am talking about and never will.

Of course, I am not talking about men and women who are married traditionally and can't have children, so don't bother mentioning them as among the "offended" - you know exactly who I am talking about.

You will miss out on the real happiness and the true meaning of life if you don't embrace and follow the tradition. You will not be surrounded by children and grandchildren that are bound to you by ties more powerful than just biology, but by greater things like gratitude for the gift of life and sacrifice. By consciously choosing to abandon traditional family life, you bar yourself from that level of happiness and joy. If you don't like hearing this and that is the root of your offense, why not just ignore what I am saying? You can choose whatever life you like.

I am happy to forgive you your perverse behavior. However, there are some people to which you do an enormous disservice and it has nothing to do with anything they did:  your unborn children.  They deserve a life, they deserve a father and mother that are devoted to each other and the lives of their children. They deserve the opportunity to have families of their own and children that call you Grandma and Grandpa and enjoy coming to see you and spending time with you.  However, if you choose lifestyles that pervert natural families, none of this will happen. They will never be born in the first place and it will have been your choice and your fault. Perhaps you need their forgiveness more than mine. If you like, I will also happily play the social justice role and speak for these unborn children of yours.

Do I offend you by saying this? Imagine how your unborn child feels about your use of the cheap trick of offense to rationalize your refusal to give them the gift that your parents sacrificed in order to bestow on you! What a selfish decision and you salt the wound by adding self-serving "offense" to it!

Fortunately, you can choose more wisely. You can choose to still get married in the traditional way to someone you love (surely you are a person capable of loving a member of that "other" sex) and likely still have children (although disease around perversion can complicate this) and devote yourself to your spouse and kids in ways passed down through the generations before you. You can enjoy that special happiness and joy that only parenthood provides.  It is all still available to you if you simply choose to abandon perverse lifestyles.

If you change your ways and love your traditionally-joined spouse, bring children into the world, and raise them with your best effort, I am sure your children will forgive your early indiscretions. They will be glad to have you for a parent, no matter how offended you once said you were at the thought of honoring the gift that parents give to their children - that your parents gave to you.  You can have the joy of honoring your parents by giving them grandchildren and enjoy that joy yourself at some point in the future. Isn't that worth forgoing a little perverse pleasure today to obtain and hold onto something greater forever?